Daydreams...

I miss writing to an extent you can't imagine. I miss swaying with the words and meanings to come out with a total different sentence than the one I planned to write. I miss daydreaming and imagining things that aren't true just because it feels magical. I miss the friend in you. --------------------------------------- Things have been crazy, really crazy, since I last wrote. I got overwhelmed in life and work and love. I was super busy and super happy. And still, the busyness of life isn't leaving me alone. Now I feel tired, exhausted, yet willing to stay up and never let it go that easily, this time. I'm trying to fight, for a change. I'm not complaining, I'm affirming that I'm strong. --------------------------------------- Sometimes it's a leap of faith that you must take to pursue some kind of happiness. It's an opportunity you see and you wish not to let go easily. A dream that you look upon and keep wishing it turns into a reality. You know h...

Dear future husband, You’re the one who knows me best, or so I believe. You’re the one who knows my life, how it was, and how I’d like it to be. You’re the one who knows my conditions and situations. You know what I've been through, what I've missed in my life, and what have hurt me the most. You know it all.  So, now, I deliver you the responsibility of making it all up for me. Everything I've missed in my life, I want you to be it, and make it happen for me. I’m looking highly up at you. And I know, with every piece of my heart, that you will never let me down. You’ll be my father, before you are my husband. You’ll be my brother, before you are my lover. And you’ll be my everything. I depend on you. And I’ll depend more. For I’ll give you my all. And you know how ready I am to do so. And I’m not afraid. I don’t worry at all. Because I trust you. And before I trust you, I trust God. Because I've prayed to God, to make you the person...

Life is beautiful, indeed! Life has a lot of beautiful things out there waiting for me to enjoy. It was me, I was the one who wasn't getting the beauty of life and spending my life hiding under my bed. Then I figured out why I'm hiding, it's because I making myself believe that I have no idea how I shall enjoy the life I wish to enjoy. And this is a lesson I can pass to you, never make yourself believe things that aren't true! Don't assume before you learn very well if your assumption has a huge possibility of being right or not. However, I must admit I have some clues and I'm getting the rest soon.  Everyday is a day to remember, to learn, to enjoy, to live and so to dream...  So, yes, everyday deserves to be written. But it's the will to write that matters, because sometimes you may have a lot of things to talk about, yet you don't want to talk, and sometimes you have nothing at all to say, but you do manage to say something just because you...

I had once said: " Today, you were the one who corrects me without embarrassing me, who blames me without making me feel bad about myself, who advices me rather than shouts at me, and who supports me the most when I needed it the most just from you. " Until I feel this again, until it becomes a true feeling and not just an illusion, I'm not settling for anything less! That's the promise I give to myself.

I came to realize that you are not the person who I thought you were. I remember the day I announced you as a dear and best friend. And I remember you saying how glad you are. But then, you never treated me that way. Maybe once or twice, just because it was easy at that time to do so, just because you too needed a friend. But no, you never were a friend to me, and I don't believe you'd ever be. I'm not disappointed or anything. I just keep saying this out loud to myself to accept the fact that not everything I would wish for, I would get. 

You break hearts, and you fix them. You make hearts beat fast in happiness and in grief. Hearts can easily fall on your hands. Like butterflies, you gather them in jars. And you don't even know it. Or maybe you do. But it's beautiful, too beautiful to be true. Because it's never your fault, it's the hearts' fault for falling inside your jar. The funny part is that you keep the jar open for hearts to break free, but they don't, they love staying inside, because, honestly, it's warm and beautiful. And it's beautiful because you really take good care of the hearts which fall inside your jars. But sometimes you skip and miss a heart or two, maybe you haven't noticed them falling or you just thought they flew away, this is the only time you break a heart. It's wonderful how hearts come looking for you though you haven't called for any at all. It's wonderful how hearts seek your help, though you don't look like a one who mends broken h...