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Showing posts from May, 2013

#180: The only thing left of you

There is a picture that I used to adore from the very first time my eyes glanced it. Now, you have no idea how much I hate it, for all the bad memories it brings. Feelings change. So does people. When you go, at least make sure your picture stays beautiful. For it will be the only thing left of you.

#179: Late at Night

There comes a time when you feel too tired to even speak. And as much as you try, no sounds come out of your moving mouth. And every faint sound around you hurts your ears badly. The sound of the clock ticking is so loud that your whole body tickles with it. Your breathing is so heavy that you actually count your breaths. You’re trembling from the inside. You don’t feel your head or your limbs. And though silence surrounds you, there’s a very loud scream inside of you. You try to sleep, you try to escape this void, but you don’t. And your mind can’t stop analyzing every sound it hears, or had ever heard before. You start drawing pictures and directing movies of people you haven’t even heard of before. All inside your little mind. You hear another faint sound, it grabs your attention and your breathing is heavy again. You start thinking “Should I keep my eyes closed, though I’m not asleep? Or should I get out of bed and light up the room?” You open your eyes, and you realize that you a

#178: Emotions

Mixed up emotions. Overflow of emotions. Stream of negative thoughts. Hurtful feelings and words in the air. Fake people all around. They keep me wondering: Is it them? Or is it me?! Healing is not easy. Healing must be earned. All good in the world needs effort, and all evil is pretty cheap! I deserve much better than that. Yet, I keep settling for what’s low and empty! Will it ever be? Could it ever be true? Will I be surprised someday? "The future is not ours to see." ~ Doris Day I miss the magic in the words. This is taking longer than expected. I’ll never do this again to myself. This is not right. It’s not healthy. It’s not a challenge. It’s a self destruction process. Do you think it’s possible to love someone who you don’t like? Do you think you can live with someone you don’t like? Do you think it can be controlled? Do you think it’ll be pinky and butterflies all the time? أنا مشتتة Today will pass. So will tomorrow. "Regrets a