Daydreams...

"For so long Tim and I had been on the same journey to recovery. And because we’d both experienced brain damage, parts of that healing landscape were similar. But we had each traveled on that journey alone and arrived at the end almost strangers to each other." When difficulties drift you away rather than actually getting you closer to each other. That proves it wasn't real love in the first place! Source:  Where Love Leads Us - Love InshaAllah

If I say no, I’ll end years of suffering, years to come and years that are gone. And if I say yes, I’ll give us another one little weak chance of hope. I never wanted to be the one who decides. Because deep down I don’t want to be the one who has killed our hope, and our love. I don’t want to be the one who shoots the final bullet. And the fact that you keep putting me in charge makes me hate you even more. You have left me stuck, once more. Giving me no other option except rejecting your final offer, or even if I accept it, I’ll have no hopes at all.

And I don’t know if I’ll remember this tomorrow or not! I wish I do. Not because it’s beautiful, but because it’s painful, really painful. If I forget the pain, I’ll care less, fall again, and hurt myself. And when I do, I wouldn't be ready for the pain that will follow. So I’ll just re-live every moment again. But if I never forget, and it happens again, I won’t feel the pain, because pain will, in that case, become a state of mind, not an unexpected action.

There’s something about the ending that makes you want to start a new beginning. Like it tells you that there is more to this, that you’re not done yet, and that it’s just an end of a chapter, not the end of eternity! Like there will never be an end. Just beginnings.