Daydreams...

في محاولة بائسة للنوم يتقلب كلاهما على جانبيهما مرات عديدة متفرقة دون أن يتلاقا ولو لثواني. وعلى الرغم أن كلاهما يدرك مشاعر الآخر جيدا، لم يحاول أحدا إشراك الآخر في إيجاد حل لهذه الحالة التي وقعوا تحت تأثيرها، حالة القلق وعدم الاستقرار. كلا منهما كان يبحث عن طريقة للهروب بعيدا، ومع ذلك أبا أن يحاولا المشاركة في إيجاد الطريق. حتى أتت اللحظة الحاسمة؛ لحظة الوصول إلى قرار. لم يتمكنا أيضا أن يجتمعوا على قرار واحد، فإحداهما قرر الاستسلام والآخر قرر أن يثور. وهكذا كانت تمر لياليهم، بين اتفاق على الاتجاه واختلاف على الطريق.

I remember my first pain. I remember falling to the ground, crying. I remember how my heart ached. I remember that feeling quite well. However, I don't believe I'll ever have that same feeling again. Though I know that I'll fall again, but each fall will hold its own unique pain. Every time my heart will ache differently. Even numbness is a feeling; a feeling of pain.

That is the only time when writing makes sense. Writing well means writing to make the reading easier, more enjoyable, and more relieving. That, we know! But when writing takes the readers' troubles away; when writing goes beyond the meanings behind the words written, and have a whole new higher value, like to relief pain, create hope, inspire, or transform. That's the writing I want to write. That's the writing I dream of. That's the writing I hope I'm offering to the world.

Some days you just wish they could never end. Some moments you wish you could hold on forever. Today was one of those extremely happy days. And I have decided that I will enjoy my moments as long as I can, because this happiness is priceless. No one can make me laugh the way you do. The same way no one can make me cry like you do. The moon has two faces; and I decided to look at the bright side and enjoy it as long as it shines. Loving you! :)

Dear old friend, I have no idea how I had a dream of you last night, but ever since I woke up this morning, I couldn't let go of your picture in my mind. I miss you, dear friend. I miss you badly. I wonder if you miss me too. I wonder why you have abandoned our friendship. I wonder if you too dream of me every once and awhile. How come does my mind still remember you, specially in the midst of such emotionally exhausting days? I have this belief in dreams that they come right in the time we need them the most. Is my dream a sign of anything at all? Or is it just a game my mind decided to play randomly. I wish you could only know how much I miss you, how much I love you, though all the heartache you have caused me. I just want my friend back. Can I?! The friend who misses you.

When words get stuck in your throat and never attempt to get out of your heart. When emotions are too deep and complicated that they can’t be expressed, but only felt. When fear becomes the theme of your life. When you hold your own problems with your own hands but never manage to throw them away. When you choose to surrender, though you understand it very well that it really hurts to think it over. When life passes by you and you don’t get to catch it. When you just wish life stops here so you don’t live longer and make more mistakes. When you hold on to the moment so hard and wish it never leaves because you just can’t imagine how could it possibly be otherwise. Only then, just give it all up. Give it up to Allah, the owner of life and death.

Dear Mr who knows it all Who was even once called Mr All The one who gathers us in a row Then bangs the world and makes it snow I passed by all the names that were once in a fall And though I no longer need to call Your knife is still hanging on my wall And I can’t help not suffering any more At least for those who still fall For a fake personality that is short but looks tall You make me rhyme, and that’s nothing small That’s your magic and that I know So thank you for lighting up my mind after it has crashed in the blow Should you even be loved?! Is it that kind of glow?! Dear Mr Small Please stop collecting hearts!